Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Watch Your Kids…

Parents, the ones who bring children to this world, grow them up; make them identify the fine line between right and wrong, fulfill their demands, keep a check on their needs and provide them what they want. They are the guardians of the little minds. They scold them where they go wrong and bestow their love when they are broken/injured in or out. No matter how old a person gets and what he starts thinking of himself, he can never out grow his parents. He may learn new things, earn more money, see more places than his parents ever did; he still remains a little kid for his parents.

Providing your children a strong roof does not mean you are protecting them. Making them wear woolen outfits in winters can protect them from the harsh weather but won’t save them from the cold behaviors of the world. First five years in a kid’s life are the most significant. The foundation of the child’s personality gets developed then. Mother and father, both should try being present for him in these years.

Charity begins at home; so does guiding or educating your kids. I see a lot of teachers around me, whose children are not taught at home. The children are proudly sent to the tutors. Offspring of the religious people are at times ill mannered. They don’t seem to tell any of the good things to their children what they keep preaching to the world. No offense, you should orate all those things to your own kids first what you keep doing to others.

You never know how your children are treated when they step out of the house. Once the kid enters the house from school, parents are supposed to ask how his day was. How did his teacher treat him? How do his age fellows or older kids treat him? Is he enjoying his days at school or not? Ask him if he is happy or upset. And if your child tells you, a teacher treats him badly or he is being bullied at school or he doesn’t like the school; listen to him. There always is a reason behind your kid being upset. Don’t just ask him straight away; ‘what did YOU do?’ Happens a lot of times that your child is innocent, he gets treated badly in school. Many a times even the child doesn’t understand what the problem is. Talk to him, figure out his problems.

Leaving kids with nannies is in fashion these days. When they grow up they are sent to the tutors or the molvis (Quran teachers). Parents go out partying and leave their kids with housemaids. This really spoils a kid. You never know how an outsider treats your child. We have seen many cases where children get sexually harassed by housemaids. Never trust anybody when it comes to your own children. If you have to send them to the tutors or molvis, keep an eye on them. Don’t leave your child with a stranger. If we think odd behaviors or sexual harassment is inconsequential, we are wrong. They leave a dark spot on the little one’s personality; which never can be washed away.

Change your attitude towards your kids as they grow up. Don’t treat a teenager like a baby or a grown up as a teenager. Your being caring towards them is understandable. As they mature, their way of thinking and living gets different too. Cope up with their changing behaviors if you want to bridge the gap between you and your young ones. Once you nurture them their way, they will grow up to be your way. And I don’t mean you let them do, good or bad, what they do. Tell them what is bad for them and will harm them. Sit with them, talk to them. Give them time. Help them make their choices. Don’t impose your decisions on them.

Being parents a great deal of responsibility falls on your shoulders. Most of us think responsibilities include; putting kids in a good school, feeding them the high quality food full of all vitamins and minerals, getting them the best toys in the market, taking them to the park or malls, giving them all the modern facilities in the world etc. Mother and father; two people who are the most influential ingredients of a person’s life. It is in your hands how you grow your kids up. You never know what your child can do, help him make a difference.


Saturday, November 27, 2010

When I Am Gone…

We all know, death is the ultimate reality of life and we all have to die one day. Its quite an obvious thing that as we grow older we start hugging this reality more and not only this, we keep talking about it too. That’s not an obvious thing that my parents will die before me. Ofcourse, I can die before them, but they just won’t stop talking about it.

When I think about my funeral, the only thing I see is; everybody crying around me, I feel that those who never talked to me or never loved me will start missing me the day I die. Everybody will say ‘wahh.. Kiaaa bandi thi’. They all will praise me… they will understand me; will get what I always wanted to do and what was in my mind. For no good reason I presume that my enemies will cry on my death too. I only think about the good things about it.

With no offense I think, to some extent, same is what all the elderly people think when they talk about death and all. When parents talk about their death to kids, they think that their kids will realize how much they loved their kids. They want their children to realize what efforts they put in to make them what they are. Same is the case with other older people. They think the world will recognize them, if not the world, atleast their near and dear ones will know who they actually were.

If we think of it, it’s right too. If somebody dies, we only mention the positive things standing there. Nobody brings up how bad the person was. But the fact is, nobody is remembered after that. Everybody moves on. They do miss the people who go away, but that’s just temporary. I remember that I cried a lot on my grandparents’ death. I missed them too. But the truth is that was just for some time. When we get back to work, that ‘missing’ part fades away. And we all move on.

It gets really disturbing when you are reminded of it again and again that somebody near and dear to you is about to die. Everything is close to death to some elderly people. If somebody in the family dies of anything, they start thinking about it, that person had this I may have it too. If they get a cough they take it to lung failure, or if some part of their body aches, they become serious patients of something BIG. If the left side of their chest aches, it HAS to be a heart attack. Gets to be the gastric problem after a detailed checkup

They all go away and we miss them for some time, but the good things they did are always mentioned. So, the question is, isn’t it better that instead of talking about death non-stop, when we get older, we stop it and live our life fully? Doing good to others, so that they remember you. I don’t demand that everybody should stop thinking about the fact that we all will die; I just say that, just stop talking about it or maybe stop waiting for it. It will come one day and we all will die, no matter young or old. Just live your life, do whatever you can, contribute to the betterment of the world, society and the family. Stop thinking about ‘what will happen when I am gone?’..we all will die and this world will be what it was before our birth, with some obvious changes ofcourse.

Thursday, November 25, 2010

Excuse Me Teacher! Do you deserve to be one?

My mind and ears refuse to believe it when my parents tell me how their teachers helped them be what they are today. That’s quite a weird statement coming from a teachers’ kid but, honestly, I haven’t ever met a teacher who had a potential to do it. Many of the people I know choose to become teachers not because they want to be, they do it because they are mostly left with nothing else to do.

Maybe I am writing this post because I never was the favorite student of my teachers. And the truth is I always was a pathetic student. Hardly used to pass my exams, no homework, never concentrated on what teachers used to say, the only thing I used to do in school was talking and was the naughtiest girl of the class in my school. The parents-teacher meeting used to be a total embarrassment for my parents. The only good thing I remember teachers used to say to my parents was ‘she has the potential to do it but she doesn’t do it’ or ‘she is one of the most intelligent girls of the class’. So, now if I come to think of it, my teachers knew me but they still didn’t know how to handle me. I always used to wonder why am I not the favorite one. The girl who scores the highest is the teachers’ favorite, is it because she scores this much or she scores this much as a reward of being the favorite?

The questions that popup in my mind: Aren’t the teachers supposed to treat all of them equally? Should they really make one or two students their favorites? Why aren’t they all equal? Don’t the weak ones need more attention than the ones who top the class already? Can't a little more attention towards the weak ones make them better? Doesn’t their behavior affect the kids? Isn’t it the teachers who are supposed to make out of kids whatever they want?

I have this firm belief that a teacher can either make or break a kid. Unfortunately, I didn’t ever get to meet the making ones. Not talking about my personal experience only, but generally, I see a lot of teachers around me who make me wonder. Teachers mostly these days are the ones who are not really passionate about teaching, they go for it either because they are undereducated, in the sense that they don’t have any professional degree, or are the ones who are left with nothing else to do, like many girls these days do it after their high school or graduation when they get no other job. Even I tried to try my hands on it, not so seriously though, still guilty about it.

So, at the end, a request to all the teachers (especially the ones who teach primary and early secondary)…PLEASE. Stop BREAKING the kids now if you cant make them. They are always left with a negative impact. You are the ones who are supposed to give them confidence, compliment them and most of all MAKE them what they are born to be. Stop ruining them, if you have any problems and regrets in your life, strictly don’t affect the little minds with the venom in you. The future is in your hands; don’t spoil it.

Wednesday, November 24, 2010


Let us all close our eyes for one good minute and think about the places wherever we are in PAKISTAN without all this corruption, security risks, bad leaders, pollution, and electricity water gas issues. Think about your place without all these problems. Just give it a thought you at your own city, village, town etc. without all the problems you are facing rite now.are'nt you at the best place you could be.Is'nt it like heaven on earth? I am sure it is. It sure is.

Now when we say 'Wake Up PAKISTAN' we don’t really mean that we all people in PAKISTAN have to wake up early in the morning. It means we have to wake up like once we did against our enemies. Like Allama Iqbal wanted us to wake up and realize what we are doing and where we are going. Wake up means we have to bring PAKISTAN to the position Quaid e Azam wanted it to be. We have to love our country and own it. We all know that there are problems in every country. We too do have issues. We have a lot of problems that we have to solve. The youth of PAKISTAN has to solve them all. As above mentioned there are plenty of problems in PAKISTAN. We all know there are. But let it be known too that we are the only ones who can solve them all. We can't really sit and wait for the foreign powers to come and solve our problems. Its WE who have to do that. It’s been quite a long time that we have been waiting for some foreign help. But trust me we are the ones who can fix these things up. Our country MASHALLAH is blessed with unlimited natural resources. People of our country are no less talented than other country’s people. We have got it all except for the efforts we need.

It is very commonly said that what if one person stands up n starts doing what is required. All other millions of people are not doing what is required. If this is what you think than I am sorry to say you are wrong. We all want our country to flourish. We all want to do well for our country but we always think what can one person do. Trust me people. One person can do a lot. Allama Iqbal and Quaid e Azam and other great personalities were also one when they started. It’s just about a simple thought. Its ready to rain. We just need the first drop. And I am sure its YOU.

If you think it’s a corrupt society. You end it up. You be the first one to kill the corruption. You think there are no rules and regulations in the country I tell you there are. It’s just that we need to follow them. Let it be you to be the first one to start following them. If u think there is pollution. Let it be you to be the first one to end it. And most of all. If you think there are bad leaders in PAKISTAN. Let it be you to remove them. Vote for the good ones. Or if you think there’s nobody good in there. Let it be you. You step up and be the one. Start with the real work. Not just promises. People will follow you and then you will be the one who will change the country.

Its time that we stand up like one nation join hands and work hard for the betterment of the country. Running away and taking some temporary refuge in some other country will not help. Its time that we all come together as one and fight all the problems we are facing and we have to end them all. End up the differences between Punjabis, Sindhi, pathans and balochis.we all have to be one and work for the country. We have to make it the real PAKISTAN (the pure land) what Allama Iqbal dreamt of n what Quaid e Azam struggled for. Its time that we all wake up. Wakeup for a better present n the best future. Wake Up PAKISTAN!

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Childhood Memories..

For no good reason I feel like writing this aww-ly innocent poem which we used to sing/hear back when we were little kids. Our naani (grandmom) used to sing alot of these poems to us..OLD GOOD DAYS... Some parts of the poem came back to my mind some days back when my sister was singing it to my niece. Got the full poem when i googled it. Its the story of an inquisitve kid who asks alot of questions that pop up in his mind and gets no answers from anywhere. Thought about translating it into english here but wont make much sense so here it is in roman urdu...

"Yeh baat samajh me aai nahi aur ammi ne samjhaai nahi...
mein kese meethi baat karru jabb me ne mithaai khaai nahi??
Aapi bhi pakati hein halwa, wo aakhir kyu halwaai nahi?
Bhayya ki mangni ho gai kal, kyu kal he dulhan mangwaai nahi?
Yeh baat samajh me aai nahi, aur ammi ne samjhai nahi...
Naani k miyaaan jab naana hein, daadi k miyaaan jab daada hein
Tabb aapi se mein ne poocha, baaji k miyaaan kia 'baaja' hein?
Woh hans hans kr youn kehney lageen, Aey bhai! nahi yeh baat nahi
Yeh baat samajh me aai nahi, aur ammi ne samjhai nahi...
Jab naya maheena aata hai, Bijli ka bill aa jata hai
Halaankey baadal bechara ye bijli muft banaata hai
Phir hum ne apnay ghar bijli, kyu baadal se lagwai nahi?
Yeh baat samajh me aai nahi, aur ammi ne samjhai nahi...
Garr billi shair ki khaala hai, phir hum ne usey kyu paala hai?
Kiya shair bohat nalaiq hai, khala ko maar nikala hai?
Ya jungle k raja k yaha, kiya milti doodh milai nahi?
Yeh baat samajh me aai nahi, aur ammi ne samjhai nahi...
Kiyoon lambey baal hein bhaaloo k, kiyoon uski tind karaai nahi?
Kia woh bhi ganda bacha hai, ya usk baap aur bhai nahi?
Yeh uska hairstyle hai, ya jungle me koi naai nahi?
Yeh baat samajh me aai nahi, aur ammi ne samjhai nahi...
Jo taarey jagmag krtey hn, kia unki chaachi taai nahi?
Ho ga rishta koi sooraj se? yeh baat humein batlaai nahi!
Per chanda kesa maamoo hai, jab ammi ka wo bhai nahi?
Yeh baat samajh me aai nahi, aur ammi ne samjhai nahi...
mein kese meethi baat karru jab me ne mithai khai nahi?"

Sunday, October 17, 2010

Be Careful When Making A Candle..

While making a candle keep some things in mind as it can be dangerous if you are a little careless in handling it. Keep in mind the following things when making a candle or do the following in case something bad happens.
P.S. some of them i knew already and others i googled!

Always keep a bucket full of cold water near you. In case you drop the hot wax on your skin, immediately put that effected area into the water until the candle wax has cooled completely.

Be careful while handling the hot wax as it is extremely hot. In case it drops, accidently, immediately put cold water on you or the place so that it cools down and is no more in molten form.
Keep children and pets away from the workplace area.

In case the wax catches fire do not try putting it off with water. either use the fire extinguisher or cover the wax immediately.

Do NOT use any other material other than STEEL in which you melt the wax or cool it down.

DO not try breaking the wax with hand, or banging it against some hard surface, if you need a small piece of wax. Just heat your knife and then try cutting it. It will melt down and get cut easily.

If your wax gets spilled over your stove or any surface, do not try washing it and removing it as it gets harder when touches water. Heat a knife and remove the wax with it.

If you need to clean your plates/pots used in candle making, do not wash them. Heat the plates/pots and wipe them with a cloth.

Do not mix the wax colours directly, Mix them in oil first and then in the wax.

In case of gel wax, cut or break the gel wax into small pieces and then melt it or you will see bubbles in ur candles. It wont be smooth.

Wax may catch fire at high temperature so keep it at medium low temperature.

If you have some wax leftover after making a candle, cover it with wax paper and let it cool, you can use it later too.

Oil your moulds and plates well before you put the wax in them so that its easy to remove the candles later.

Do not pour wax down the drain as it gets hard immediately as it cools down and it will definitely clog your drain.

Spreading an aluminium foil over your work area can be a good idea. You can always take off the dropped wax from it and reuse it.

If you have long hair tie it back because hair can catch fire quite easily from the wax. It will also avoid your hair dropping in the wax. Hair in candles wont look nice ofcourse.

AND the LAST and THE MOST IMPORTANT ONE...keep your cockroaches away from your gel wax candles as I find a lot of burnt cockroaches lying dead in my gel wax candles.

Monday, October 4, 2010

Making A 'Chunks Candle'!!

Come people, let me tell you how we make a 'chunks candle'!
To make a candle we need:

Candle Thread (wick)
Wax colours
Steel Plates
Tins (empty food tins)


Heat the wax well in a steel tin until it gets melted and changes into liquid.
Oil the steel plates.
Mix the wax colours (the ones you want your chunks to be in) in oil and mix it to the molten wax.stir well till u get the desired colour.
Pour the coloured wax into the oiled plates.
Wait for the coloured wax to get hard and then cut the hard colored wax wih a cutter in any shape you want.
Oil the candle mould.
Pass the candle thread through the hole of the mould and cover it with clay to fill in the gap, if any.
Turn the mould upside down and fill the mould with the coloured chunks.
Pour the plain white wax into the mould.
Wait for it to get hard.
Put the mould with the hard wax in water.
Remove the candle from the mould and IT IS READY!